I am not sick... Oh well, other than having HIV virus in my system, Im healthy.

yesterday I went to R.I.T.M. way beyond schedule (who says there's traffic nearing alabang? nobody warned me!) but alas I made it.

and yes, the red spots on my face and forearms, are just papules., nothing more and nothing less, In fact, the rest of the derma doctors and Ate E are just laughing everytime I voice out a concern it could be something else... well, it Isn't.

I told S about this, he wondered why I wasn't happy to know that.

simply because, Had I been diagnosed with a STD of sort other than having HIV, then I know what's causing this, thus I will know medical treatment.... But the reason that it's just really all because of how hypersensitive my skin is... then that's a 'lil bit hard to treat, first we need to try the topical creams, then the anitbiotics then the dont-go-near-the-sun mantra and sorts. it's a complete guessing game.

however, one good point to check is that, when I was at R.I.T.M.'s derma section, I was with fellow pozzie friends who indeed, have the HIV lesions and skin problems that I thought I had. and they're all looking at me like crazy wondering If i have the same thing, and all they need to tell me is - look at your skin to ours. you are a lucky brat so get out of here! which is true. it's nice to witness first hand what they actually look like compared to seeing it on photos in the internet... certainly I don't have any of it.

plus I met fellow pozzie MN. MN is actually cute. too bad he had Steven johnson syndrome. with lack for a better word, his skin now is almost like scales, with blisters on the palm of his hand and foot. for those who didnt know, steven johnson syndrome is an allergic response of sorts, usually to some drugs that are used to Treat HIV.... that's why the next few weeks are vital for those pozzies who just started taking the medication, to know if they have some allergic reaction to the drug.

so MN, is enough evidence for me to say, hey, what you got is actually nothing. and that's all I will need to know.

and just like any other fellow pozzies, our first conversation with each other included how healthy our immune system is...

I told him mine is still good at 462... I asked him his.... he told me, that before it's 510..... surprised, I asked; so why are you on medication? that's still high! he replied: that was before, I just had my CD4 (immune system) checked and now's 330. what?!?!?!1

yeap, in just a matter of 6 months, it all went down that fast... that's why he advised me three things : always be happy, exercise, and sleep tight.

I certainly don't want to be in medications yet. better do what he says...

come to think of it, on the way home I felt happy. (all because I saw people in a worst condition than mine - bad me, bad me, but alas, it relieved my paranoia.)